One Small Year

image-66570Shameful. How long it has been since I have been here.  I read old posts and marvel that I wrote them. And I remember. Where I was. What was going on? The feelings attached.

So much is different. I got a job. A job that was okay. I met great people. It was too chaotic, too unstructured, too much, OMYGODIAMNEVERGOINGTOGETALLTHISDONEANDALSOBETHECEOSADMINBECAUSEHEWILLNEVERHIREONE.  And when you tangle with a truly toxic, weird place like that you think you are incompetent. But then everyone around you does and suddenly you realize it’s not you. It’s the place.

I made a difference in spite of it. I wrote. A ton. Boring technical things. I learned enough about cybersecurity to never want a smart fridge and to be suspicious of my Echo.

And enough to get another job in cybersecurity two weeks ago.  And here I am. Working at home.

With HOTFLASHES, and a BADBACK. And oh I just need to shut up and feel blessed and lucky. Good Lord. What is WRONGWITHME that I see holes, not donuts? I want to be a LIFE LOVER. I know them when I see them and have a few out the outskirts of my life. Is that something you are born with or learn? I am 54 and stumbling around in the dark of life and want more bliss and sun. Things are SO GOOD right now overall and I just can’t seem to get it. To wallow in the goodness that is having enough money, and decent health, and love, and good kids, and sweet cats, and cars that run, and air, water, and food…

First world problems.  The water in my glass shudders as an F18 flies overhead.


Circling the Drain. Cesspool.




I have kindling.


Dear, J,

Thank you for your interest in applying for the Vice President of Marketing position at COMPANY. The hiring process has been extremely competitive and we appreciate your contribution to that competiiton. After assessing your application, we regret to inform you that your qualifications do not quite match our needs for this particular position. Unfortunately, we are unable to continue with your application.

However, we recognized that you have exceptional capabilities, and we would be glad to consider you for a different position. We post new positions nearly every day, and we strongly encourage you to consider them by visiting our web site.

We will keep your resume on file for the possibility of future employment.

Once again, thank you for the time and effort you’ve invested in this process.
We hope you are able to find the appropriate position for your skills and talents.



Hello J,
After careful consideration, we found that your talents and experience are not quite the right fit for the Marketing Program Manager.
Thanks for including our company in your job search; we hope you will consider adding your talent to our team in the future.
New opportunities arise often, so make sure to visit our web site to view all available positions or update your candidate profile and perhaps we’ll see you again soon.
Warm regards,
Human resources
Dear J,
We have reviewed your interests and qualifications against Senior Strategy Marketing & Communications Manager  and we have chosen to move forward with other candidates. We will keep your personal data on file for future consideration. Please feel free to apply to other positions you feel are a match for your qualifications.
We appreciate your interest in our company and wish you the best of luck in your job search.



Hi J

We’ve gotten further into first-round interviews and am sorry to say that we’ve decided not to take your application further.  The competition for this role is tremendous, and we talked with a few candidates have more of the niche experience that we’re looking for.

But, I’m happy to have gotten to talk with you and wish you the best of luck in your job search.  I was really impressed by your track record of results and tenacity.  And hopefully you’ll connect with me on LinkedIn

Thanks again for applying for the Marketing Manager position here



Thank you for your interest in the Marketing Communications Consultant (Digital Marketing & Social Media) position at COMPANY.  We carefully considered your qualifications and although you were not selected for this position, I encourage you to apply online for future openings.

Thank you for your interest in a career with us.  We wish you the best in your future endeavors.


The Recruiting Department
Dear J,

Thank you for giving us the opportunity to consider you for our Product Marketing Manager role.  We have reviewed your application and qualifications and will not be moving forward to next steps with you for this position.  We appreciate your interest in our company and wish you success in your job search.


The {CCCC}  Recruiting Team